THE SECRETS 2

The call

When I got home I kept on pondering over all I have heard and I didn’t know if I should be grateful or sad to have heard those things. I couldn’t even recall anything Pastor preached in church because I was totally lost throughout the remaining part of the service.
While I made lunch for myself, the issue remained so heavy on my heart but there was no one I could trust with matters like that, especially after the realization of the power of pretense that sister Shola demonstrated.

I had always known Victoria as a talkative and someone who lacks tongue control but I thought sister Shola was using their closeness to help her get better. However I finally had to come to the conclusion that their relationship has been so close because they are obviously birds of Same feathers.

After eating and thinking about them for a long time, I slept off and a call from an unknown number woke me up. I picked up the phone but the call dropped before I could answer it. As I was about to go back to sleep, my phone rang again and I picked it up.

“Hello, am I speaking with Funmi?” , she asked.
“Yes, you are”, I replied still not knowing who the caller was. For those few minutes I had not even had a recall of what happened in church. I still needed more rest and I saw the call as a disturbance.

“Well, this is Shola on the line, Shola from church”
“Jesus Christ!” was my response and I hung up immediately in shock and not knowing how to respond to anything she had called to say. She called severally after then but I didn’t answer her calls. I had to switch my phone to airplane mode so she won’t be able to reach me.

Still in my confused state, I heard a knock on my door and opened up to see that it was Tolani. I had totally forgotten about our discussion on her coming to spend the night at my place. I had not made dinner because I didn’t even have peace of mind and as I saw her I knew I had to rush to get things done.

Tolani’s Opinion

After dinner, Tolani kept on talking about different things and showing me things on her phone but after she realized I was uninterested in all she was doing, she sat me up and pressured me to tell her what was bothering me.
Tolani was never a fan of sister Shola and I knew it. Each time I shared my admiration of sister Shola with her she was always quick to change the topic of discussion. I thought she was being jealous and sometimes I even asked if she hated her but she won’t even answer that.

I narrated all that happened to Tolani and she started hissing and expressing how she had always suspected sister Shola was not who she appeared to be.

It was during her rants I got to know she had always been close to Pastor (Mrs). Apparently, Tolani had been an undercover agent of Pastor (Mrs) all the while and I didn’t even know anything about it. She said she was going to introduce me to pastor Mrs so I could relate all that happened to her myself. I was not interested in all of that because I enjoyed my safe space without the familiarity with the church people but Tolani was relentless.

All through school activities the next day, Victoria tried to speak with me but Tolani remained by my side and didn’t give her any chance to say whatever she had to say. Tolani had adviced that I place a ban on the number sister Shola had called me with and I heeded.

First attack during Bible study

Tuesday was the bible study day and Tolani had been successful in convincing me to share what I heard with pastor (Mrs), saying that it was an evil thing and keeping the secret will only make me a part of the evil. I didn’t want to be counted as a part of evil gathering and conspiracy against a Woman of God and so I agreed to share my experience in the restroom on Sunday with Pastor Mrs after Bible study.

Bible study was anchored by sister Shola and many times she looked towards me and I tried to avoid her stares and to my shock, when it was time for discussion sister Shola called my name and asked if I had any contributions to add to the teaching.

I felt like she wanted to humiliate me before everyone knowing fully well that I was not attentive from the beginning of her teaching to the end. I remember how the whole congregation looked towards me to hear whatever I had to say and for few seconds I couldn’t find any words.

Tolani was next to me and she held my hand that was close to her and that helped my confidence in a great way because I found the words and simply said “I think you have done more than enough justice to every part of the topic ma’am, I have nothing to add, Thank you”. Sister Shola flashed me a threatening look and said

 “Well, in gatherings like this, the Holyspirit must have dropped some other things in your heart for the edification of the church, especially messages the teacher didn’t even mention. It’s a proof that you are truly connected and the reason we give room for contributions at the end of every teachings”.

I felt that so strong and I could feel anger and hurt welling up within me in response to the sharp arrows that were just shot at me. Every part of me wanted to scream; “Are you trying to say I don’t have the Holyspirit ma? Or are you just trying to cause trouble?”. However, I simply looked at her and allow the feeling of disgust I was getting by her actions soak in before speaking quietly into Tolani’s ears; “This lady no get sense at all”.

Feel free Funmi, we’re family here

Immediately after Bible study, pastor Mrs walked towards me smiling and opening her arms wide to embrace me. I felt the intensity of fakeness but I didn’t want to be disrespectful and so I accepted her embrace and followed her into her office. Bro Kenneth was already in the office before our arrival and a fast gush of feelings rushed through my soul as I saw him in his well-ironed shirt and trousers but it was replaced by a sharp chest pain on remembering that he had his eyes on another sister.

Pastor Mrs offered me a seat close to this brother and for the first time, bro Kenneth greeted me with an handshake and smiled directly at me.

It felt like I was going to faint that I almost missed the question when he asked to know my name. Ofcourse, even the question left me in awe as to whether he really didn’t know my name or he was just trying to use that to begin a conversation. Was it not two days ago Tolani mentioned my name in that embarrassing scenerio in the bus?. I told him my name and as he was about to ask more questions, Tolani walked into the office and they exchanged pleasantries.

I had not expected Bro Kenneth to be present for the meeting but we were there already and I couldn’t ask questions then. Pastor Mrs tried being a little more friendly and Tolani kept saying “Feel free Funmi, we are family here”. As she said those words, I remember days pastor Mrs had said same thing to the congregation and the thought of sister Shola being a part of the congregation she had called family even when they knew they didn’t like each other caused a withdrawal within me.

The only question on my mind was “How many more fake relationships do we have based on lies on pretense in this church?”. I didn’t allow my worries overwhelm me though and I was not ready to keep sister Shola’s secrets especially after what she did during bible study that evening and so I didn’t hesitate when pastor Mrs asked me to confirm all that Tolani had told her.

Before leaving the office that day, I heard lots of stories about the mistakes, weaknesses and secret sins sister Shola had being involved in and some that was still present. The part that got my interest the most was when Bro Kenneth mentioned that Victoria’s talks about him going to the relationship committee about sister Juliet were all lies and based on her imaginations which are actually fueled by jealousy. It was funny to know that Victoria was actually interested in Bro Kenneth but since it was hard to get him for herself she wanted to use sister Shola as a tool to punish any lady that gets his attention.

About two hours into the meeting, I was already feeling uncomfortable at how matters about different members of the church was being brought up and I quickly informed pastor Mrs that I’d like to take me leave. She asked me questions about myself and my purpose before finally instructing Bro Kenneth to drop Tolani and herself off at her house and also drop me at mine with his car. Her husband, and our Pastor, pastor James was out of town for that week, providing the opportunity to spend those long hours discussing.

Bro Kenneth O’clock

Bro Kenneth dropped Tolani and Pastor Mrs on our way to my hostel and soon, it was just the two of us in the car. He talked about his experience as an undergraduate and some other general things to keep the conversation active. When we got to my busstop I told him he could drop me off but he disagreed saying pastor Mrs didn’t instruct him to drop me off at the busstop but at home and that was how he got to know my hostel. I bid him goodbye and he waited out there till I went into my room.

It was pleasing to see the very hard Bro Kenneth being so kind and caring and soon I was back to my fantasies about being the lucky girl to have him at last. The minutes I spent alone with him in the car and the way he had said he was not interested in sister Juliet were the best parts of the evening for me. I knew there was something about the way he looked at me as I walked into my hostel corridor and I was ready to fight Victoria and even sister Shola if they tried getting in my way. It was late and I decided to take biscuits and tea before going to bed.

I was checking through my WhatsApp and giving replies to messages when I saw a message from Victoria which read; “Whatever it is they told you, all I have to say is that you better be very careful”.

My initial prompting was to send an audio message to her to express how angry I was about her church mother’s behavior and also give her some bits of mockery to make her know their secrets were in my hands but I decided against it concluding that she wasn’t worth that effort and so I simply ignored her message. I had rounded off my chats with my friends for the night when I saw a new message notification and I clicked on it to see;

“Hi dear sis, I’m guessing you are asleep already, just wanted to say thank you to you for trusting us enough to have opened up this evening. it gave me an opportunity to clear the wrong rumors about Juliet and I and also gave a warning to be mindful of my closeness to sisters to avoid misinterpretations.
Thank you so much. I got your contact from the church group by the way.
Have a good night rest
Ken.

After reading the message, I screamed into my pillow; “I knew it!”. I remember how happy I felt that night. I had never been so happy before that day. It was all I needed to confirm my thoughts about getting his attention already. And I was not wrong.

Revenge during Sunday school

Few months after that evening, I had developed a better relationship with pastor Mrs and even paid her visits at her house, received foodstuffs from her, received clothes and shoes from her and I already forgot the feeling of fakeness I had on my first encounter with her.
Sister Shola stopped trying to get at me during her teachings after I showed her I was more than enough to defend myself.

It was during a Sunday school class and the topic was “Love”, immediately she asked if there was anyone who had anything to say, I put up my hands and I could read from her expression that she wasn’t expecting it. She must have thought I was a very gentle girl who she could intimidate and humiliate at will and not get a fight-back.

“Hallelujah Church, as I sat down here listening to every word from our teacher, the Holyspirit dropped in my heart a need to say something. I have always been quiet and calm but this is a strong nudge I can’t resist.
You see, when we talk about topics like this, it is always those that know so much about the importance of these things that do not practice them. You know, some and even go on teaching about it for hours and yet not live by it themselves. All I just want to say is that as christians, we should not only be good at talking about Love and quoting scriptures on it but we should make it a priority to live by what we preach, Thank you”

The reaction from the church was a mixed one but I didn’t care. The look of hurt on sister Shola’s face was my goal and that was exactly what I got. It left her speechless for a while before she got off the shock and returned to her charismatic composure.

After the service, she walked up to me and asked what I meant by what I said during the Sunday school. I told her I believe what I said was explanatory enough and before walking away she gave me a very rude look and said; “Don’t try me girl, you won’t win. The day you ever try to get to me that way again you will have yourself to blame”. I laughed at her pride and said back to her “The only one who should be this bold on threats should be one without secrets dear, Don’t try me too, you have lost already”

Well, I had an history of always implicating people and blackmailing them before I finally gave my life to Christ. So, it felt like what I had missed so much and I was enjoying it. I made sure I frustrated her by always going to greet her when people were there and when she wouldn’t be able to ignore my greetings.

The long awaited……

The greatest show began after Bro Kenneth finally asked me to go on courtship journey with him. We agreed to keep it secret and we didn’t even inform the relationship committee. Pastor Mrs was aware and that was enough for us. Ofcourse my friend Tolani was involved in the whole relationship thing from the beginning and was always so proud to have been the one who brought us together. Anyway, I did all I could to make sure that sister Shola got to know about the relationship.

Sometimes I’ld bring up talks about him with Tolani when I see her coming towards us, other times I’ll make funny faces at him when she’s looking towards me.

Purpose before feelings

Pastor Mrs promised to inform the pastor about us and she did.

He called for the both of us and while he spoke with us I learnt so many things I was ignorant of before then. He asked me questions about my purpose and plans towards it and I couldn’t give a sound answer.

He asked Bro Kenneth the same question and I was amazed at the brilliant replies he gave. He talked about going into evangelism and his assignment to win souls for Christ in villages.

Pastor asked if I could cope with that and that was the first time I realized we have not really being building or talking about anything in the relationship and I had worries crawling through my mind. I was never a fan of going into full time ministry or getting married to a man who will be traveling all around for the sake of ministry.

That was my first fear in the relationship and whenever I brought it up, Bro Kenneth would say “Babe, if you love me, we’ll work it out together and God will help us”. Sometimes I’ll bring it up and he’ll say I am just being lazy and not ready to grow. This led to series of misunderstanding and arguments. Another time I suggested that we needed to go see pastor again so we could get clarity but he disagreed immediately saying the pastor doesn’t like him and will only try to ruin our relationship.

I couldn’t understand how Bro Kenneth and the pastor were not on good terms and how he could still Keep a close relationship with pastor Mrs but I tried to be less inquisitive. I loved him anyway and didn’t want to lose him, so I stopped bringing up the issue and we were fine.
All of these drama in one church you’ll say. Well, what can I say?. I wouldn’t have believed if I had not been involved too.

Shameful exit of the enemies

After my third year, I had to come home for the holidays and by the time I traveled back, I learnt sister Shola left the church already. When I asked, Bro Kenneth told me Victoria was reported for being involved in immoral acts with some of the brothers in church and during her meetings with the disciplinary committee in which sister Shola was a part, sister Shola acted like she wasn’t as close to Victoria and was even giving the toughest punishments.

This aggravated Victoria and she stood up against sister Shola right there in the presence of everyone and said a lot of shameful things about sister Shola which was to the greatest surprise of everyone. Sister Shola walked out crying and didn’t come back to the church again and neither did Victoria.

Bro Kenneth wasn’t ready to give me the details of what happened but he said Victoria mentioned how sister Shola had been trying to get the pastor’s attention off his wife and on her and failed but was not giving up.

The reason he said that was because there was a new rule in the pastor’s home not to allow any visitors into their house for some time, except for emergency purposes.

Bro Kenneth and I have always met at the pastor’s house, under the watch of pastor Mrs and with the new rule, we had to find another meeting point. I suggested that we meet in restaurants and other open places but he disagreed.

So we started meeting at each other’s houses and emotions started taking it’s course when we would both sit and stare at each other for a long period of time and one would so long for the other’s touch.

I told Bro Kenneth we had to seek for help by informing someone about it, maybe the pastor, his wife or both of them but he thought it was a shameful thing and I was stupid to think covering the shame was the solution.

******************************************************
Evening was approaching and our General overseer and his wife had decided to excuse themselves from the meeting at the district to ensure that they hear the last of my story.

My parents were present and even Bolatito our house help had joined the audience. I was about to share the deepest part of the story and I felt a huge weight on my chest and a lump in my throat as I tried to continue.
Tears welled up in my eyes and I asked to be excused to go use the restroom. Big mummy volunteered to follow me and I couldn’t refuse.

Stepping into the bathroom, I washed my face but the tears won’t stop. As I walked back through the corridor to the sitting room, my legs couldn’t carry me again and I just sat on the floor. I tried to scream but couldn’t, I tried to say somethings but all I could say was “I was used”.

Big mummy sat on the floor next to me not minding if her clothes would get stained and she carefully lifted my head unto her shoulder, my tears wet her clothes but she didn’t mind.

As she patted my back she sang the hymn “Jesus loves me” into my ears and that made me cry even more. I held her so tightly and at that moment I wished I had been close to her before leaving for school. Maybe, just maybe I won’t even be sharing a story as bad as this.

I finally gained composure but told her I was scared of my mum’s reaction if she heard what I was going to say because it would really hurt her. Big mummy understood this and went into the sitting room to inform the others that I would prefer to share the rest of the story at my convenient time.

I saw the worry on my mum’s face and the inquisitiveness on my dad’s face but I thought keeping it away from them was better.

Big mummy and daddy were about to leave and they asked that we all pray together. Daddy began the prayer by saying;

“Thank you Father for loving us despite our mistakes and making restoration available until us in Jesus” ,

immediately I felt the boldness to say it all not minding what anyone would feel and I begged them all to listen to the rest of my story.
“Thank you Jesus” my parents said.

 

 

To be continued………….

As we await the last part of the story, can we drop our comments on these;

– Is Bro Kenneth truly as Holy as he seems?

– Was Funmi wrong to have given sister Shola that humiliation revenge?

– What shall we say about the meeting that turned out to be a panel for discussing other people’s mistakes and shortcomings?

– Should Funmi be mindful of her new relationship with pastor Mrs?

 

Let the comments roll in as we continue on Faithplane, a journey through Faith way.